Mastering Self-Discipline: Navigating Challenging Supervisors with Critical Thinking

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Dealing with a challenging supervisor takes high-level thinking skills and courageous navigation. You must not jump to emotional responses.

We can use simple interest and compound interest as a metaphor to describe two different types of investment thinking that might help us decide how to deal with a challenging supervisor.

The most successful investors study investment strategies. They make decisions based on facts and demonstrate self-discipline. They know that their investment will yield more with compound interest when compared to simple interest investing. As we solve the challenging supervisor situation, we must be like the wise investor, so our actions provide us with the best return over time.

With simple interest, the return on investment is very minimal. Without investment knowledge, signing a contract that involves simple interest on your investment (principal investment) will result in little reward over time. In the same way, feeling like a victim, a person who has no control, or letting your emotions guide your responses and decision-making will not result in positive outcomes. We should avoid thinking and problem-solving similar to the investment simple interest strategy. We need to make more informed and strategic decisions.

Critical thinkers know that they must channel their energy toward things they control. The outcomes will be much more positive. Like the investor who knows how to make their investment grow exponentially over time using compound interest, critical thinkers get much more of a positive outcome by understanding that they control themselves, their emotions, and personal decision-making.

Below are some considerations for dealing with a challenging supervisor:

You must have the courage to talk to your supervisor. What are you expected to do? Ask for clarification when you need it. The supervisor's objective should be your objective. How do they want a task accomplished? Help them get results. Be an expert at listening as you gather information.

You must be respectful. Although stress might be high, you must be the person who does not become disrespectful. Being civil is a way to demonstrate control of yourself. If your supervisor is not polite or respectful, do not let their behavior influence your self-control. You control your behavior. Losing control of your emotions will not help the relationship between you and your supervisor.

Stay calm during interactions. For example, those who show anger at times of stress should find ways to improve self-control. With anger, you will be damaging the relationship. Focus on being respectful and calm during interactions. Many people use breathing strategies to decrease stress. Even if your boss is not calm, you will be setting the example. You do not control your boss, but you control yourself.

Try to build a relationship of respect. This is different from trying to become a friend. A respectful relationship will be more appropriate as you work with your supervisor. You respect them, and hopefully, they will respect you.

You may have to ask others for help navigating a challenging supervisor situation. This is different than talking behind the supervisor's back. Instead, find a mentor who will confidently listen and share ideas with you about dealing with specific problems. Never join a group of colleagues who talk behind the supervisor's back. The same people are probably talking about you when you are not around. The people who behave like victims and constantly complain think from a simple interest perspective. The outcome will be less than satisfactory.

You can learn what not to do from challenging bosses. When you are the leader, you can choose how you interact with others. Also, keep in mind that no one is a perfect leader. Be reasonable when your supervisor is not perfect.

Is it a good idea to go to your supervisor's boss? This is mostly a bad idea. Supervisors usually become unhappy when the people they supervise go to the organizational levels above to get things done. Going above your supervisor will likely be a mistake and hurt the relationship.

Becoming irreplaceable is an excellent example of thinking similar to the compound interest perspective. Your outcome will be much more successful. You might know someone who quit without notice. Quitting because you are frustrated with a bad supervisor might not benefit you personally. Instead, look for opportunities to grow in your job. Become an invaluable employee. If you choose to leave, be in a situation where you are not destroying relationships with your employer. Do not burn the bridge as you move on to new opportunities. There is no need to destroy relationships, even with a challenging supervisor.

There are many levels of challenging or bad supervisors. I did not discuss severely flawed supervisors. For example, unethical behavior is different than ineffective behavior. Actions in response to unethical behavior will require decision-making but possibly immediate action beyond the ideas in this article.

Dealing with bad supervisors can be highly challenging, but we can learn from the situation. You should focus on what you control and should not make decisions based on emotions. Critically thinking through the problem is essential. Like the expert investor, find ways to make decisions that will benefit you the most in the future. By problem-solving at high levels, you have the best chance of getting positive results and future success.

Martial Arts Perspective:

During a Delaware Hapkido Martial Arts Academy leadership class, participants discussed how to deal with a challenging supervisor. We all encounter challenges with people. We try to provide solutions to this type of challenge through our training programs. We encourage our students to become leaders and demonstrate critical thinking and self-control.

Beginners in our program learn quickly that martial arts training requires mental and physical training. In addition, students learn to work with people with different personalities in our training facility. The learning opportunities help our students in and out of the training facility.

Questions:

Have you had challenges with another person? How would you evaluate your handling of the situation? How could you improve dealing with challenging people?

What is your opinion about staying calm during stressful situations?

Can the same problem-solving skills found in the article be applied to other challenges with people? Explain your answer.

How would you compare an investor who depends on simple interest investments and an investor who believes in using compound interest investments?

Principles do not change over time. Based on information found in the article, write a people skill principle.